A Piece of Writing Openly Serving as an Open Letter to Rick Perry

Hey Rick! Oh, sorry ‘scuse us, Mr. Perry. The guy-next-door nature of your video made us feel like we know you, know you. Anyway after watching this little gem, which you have hilariously aptly entitled “Strong”, we had a few questions for you. 

1. How do you feel about gay kids openly celebrating Christmas? 

1A. Or Christmas kids openly serving in the gay military? 

1B. Or what about Christmas kids having openly ethnic skin?

Moving along:

2. What are your thoughts on religious people openly listening to Christmas Carols sung by Wham?

Probably good, right? Because when you say “Faith made America strong,” you are referring to openly gay George Michael’s hit single “Faith,” right? Because we agree! 

And lastly:

3. What are your thoughts on religious people serving openly in the outdoors? In gay Christmas coats?